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MIL torture


Discussions on "MIL torture" in "In-Laws" forum.


  1. #1
    Bommi.SG's Avatar
    Bommi.SG is offline Newbie
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    MIL torture

    Hi sis..i got married to my relative... So i thought i wont have any MIL problems there... i know basic cooking from my 10th std... and i started cooking new recipes to him.. we r not with my ILs..even though they ll visit us once in three months..and will be here for 10 days... first time she dint say anything abt my cooking bcoz she was wondering... next time she came here,,and she was telling something for my every works,,, and before i got married my FIL likes only my MIL's cooking..aft tasting my new recipes he loved it.from this she started like this... if any recipe of her turned bad she ll say my vessel is the reason... And she used to tell too much of lies... i was crying daily..and they started to hometown... my hubby understd me and her nature very well..but he never open up infront of her.. i dont knw how to react with her next time..

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  2. #2
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    jv_66 is offline Super Moderator Silver Ruler's of Penmai
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    Re: MIL torture

    Welcome to Penmai.....Bommi.

    Please don't worry dear.

    When your In-laws are visiting once in a while, then it is not much difficult to face your MIL.

    Hereafter, when your MIL tells that your cooking is not good, you ask her inturn as, how to cook that item and you want to learn it from her. You can also tell then and there, that her cooking is superb. If you always praise her, even if it is not good, she will feel very happy by your praising words and will not think of hurting you anymore.

    Yes....she might feel jealous when your FIL is praising your cooking. This is very common with most of the women.

    Even you may feel the same when your husband happens to praise someone else's cooking. This is quite normal. I will also feel the same way.

    So, you should not feel for these things.

    You just have to keep quiet.

    You should not cry in front of them. You can cry in your room.

    Since your husband is able to understand you, then what is the problem.

    You cannot expect him to support only you, in front of his mother, who has brought him up for so many years. You should understand this. This is just a simple matter and what your husband is doing now is very correct.

    He should not fight for these simple matters with his parents.

    After all they are visiting you once in 3 months only, isn't it.....

    So, hereafter, make up your mind, that you need to face your MIL's words, whenever she is intimating their visit.

    If you make up your mind to face anything, then the actual impact will surely be less. Later this will become the regular habit.

    And if you do not react to your MIL's harsh words and if you start praising her for her every deeds, she will start praising you later. Even if she is not doing so, atleast she will not scold you.

    Then and there, and for every occasions, you get new dresses or any other gifts for your in-laws,which will please them.

    Initially, you take your MIL to the shop and get the gift of her choice. otherwise, she might find fault for this also.

    In these ways, you can please them and be compatible with them.

    Try these. Never back answer your in-laws.


    Jayanthy





  3. #3
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    Re: MIL torture

    என்னோட கருத்து என்னனா உங்க மாமியார்க்கு இப்ப உங்க மேல சின்ன பொறாமை மற்றும் அவங்க பையன் மேல் possiveness அது தான் இப்படி நடந்திகிறாங்க. எல்லார் வீட்லயும் இந்த மாதிரி பிரச்சனைகள் ஆரம்பத்தில வரும் அதை கண்டுக்காம விடுறது தான் நல்லது.

    உங்க கணவர் உங்களுக்கு சப்போர்ட் பண்ணி அவங்களை எதாவது சொன்னா வீனா மனஸ்தாபம் தான் வரும். நீங்க கொஞ்சம் பொறுமையா இருக்கலாம். நீங்க அவங்க பேசுறதை கண்டுக்காம இருந்தாலே உங்க மாமியார் மாறிடுவாங்க. அவங்க எப்பவோ ஒரு தடவை தான வராங்க நீங்க இதை பெரிசுபடுதினா உங்க கணவர் நிலை தான் பாவம், அதுக்கு நீங்க கொஞ்சம் விட்டு கொடுத்தா உங்க கணவர் மனசிலையும் உங்க மேல அன்பு பெருகும்.

    நீங்க கொஞ்ச நாளைக்கு உங்க மாமியார் என்ன செஞ்சாலும் அவங்களை புகழுங்க, அத்தை உங்க சமையல் அவருக்கு பிடிக்கும் நீங்களே சமையல் பண்ணுங்கன்னு சொல்லி பாருங்க.

    சில நேரம் சின்ன விஷயம் கூட பெருசா தெரியும் அப்புறம் நாம யோசிச்சு பார்க்கும் போது இந்த சின்ன விஷயத்துக்கு போய் நாம டென்ஷன் ஆகிடோமேன்னு தோணும்.

    கவலை படாதீங்க அவங்க உங்களை புரிஞ்சிப்பாங்க.

    Ramya Rajan
    “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.” ― Mother Teresa

    வழியோரம் விழி வைக்கிறேன் - full story link

  4. #4
    ramyaraj's Avatar
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    Re: MIL torture

    JV Sister naan post pannathum unkaloda post paarththaa neenkalum athai thaan solli irukkeenka....naama ore urula athu thaan ore maathiri yosikirom

    Parasakthi, sumathisrini and jv_66 like this.
    Ramya Rajan
    “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.” ― Mother Teresa

    வழியோரம் விழி வைக்கிறேன் - full story link

  5. #5
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    Re: MIL torture

    Quote Originally Posted by ramyaraj View Post
    JV Sister naan post pannathum unkaloda post paarththaa neenkalum athai thaan solli irukkeenka....naama ore urula athu thaan ore maathiri yosikirom

    ஒரே ஊர்னால மட்டும் இல்ல ரம்யா , கல்யாணம் ஆகி சில வருஷங்கள் ஆன எல்லாருமே , இந்த மாதிரிதான் பதில் சொல்லுவோம் . அனுபவம் பேசும்ல .

    Jayanthy





  6. #6
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    Re: MIL torture

    Quote Originally Posted by jv_66 View Post
    ஒரே ஊர்னால மட்டும் இல்ல ரம்யா , கல்யாணம் ஆகி சில வருஷங்கள் ஆன எல்லாருமே , இந்த மாதிரிதான் பதில் சொல்லுவோம் . அனுபவம் பேசும்ல .
    True ka......

    Parasakthi, sumathisrini and jv_66 like this.
    Ramya Rajan
    “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.” ― Mother Teresa

    வழியோரம் விழி வைக்கிறேன் - full story link

  7. #7
    Bommi.SG's Avatar
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    Re: MIL torture

    Thanks a lot sisters.... am also being quiet only... ..


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