life is sinking...
Discussions on "life is sinking..." in "Married Life" forum.
27th Apr 2014, 08:41 PM #1Newbie
- Join Date
- Apr 2014
life is sinking...
i am here to get solution for my problem. we both (me and my husband) are very close to each other and have a very good understanding with us till last 4 months. we do share everything tat happens in the day usually before going to bed. he didn't hided any thing from me till last 4 months.. but now from the december 2013 he is coming to bed lately. he is busy with his computers in the night till 12 or 1.... we usually goes to sleep by 11.30. but now he coming this much lately. i think he is chatting with some girl friends through internet.
i don't know how to ask him. whenever i ask him why you are spending this much time he is saying i have some official works, but while i am noting i can see that he is not doing any official works he is simply smiling by facing the comptuer.
how can i bring my husband from the relation ... i don't know what to do? so much afraid of this... and breaking my heart fully..
27th Apr 2014, 10:42 PM #2
Re: life is sinking...
Welcome to Penmai.....friend.
Please do not worry.
There should never be any secret between the couples, after the marriage.
Let me suggest few to overcome this problem.
Initially, you watch him from his back, as what he is doing during that time(in the computer at late night), without his knowledge. Thus, you can get confirmed, as what he is watching.
Next, you tell him that, having slept along with him, all these years ( I don't know how long you are married) or all these months, now you feel so lonely to sleep without him even for that time lapse when he is not coming to sleep.
So, tell him that, from tomorrow, you are also going to sit beside him till he is coming to sleep.
During this time, sit at a little distance away from him and be reading some books. Then and there, be talking with him.
If he is really working, he will be able to answer your questions or participate in your talks.
On the other hand, if he is chatting with any girls, he will surely not answer to you or concentrate on your talks.
Even if he is sitting in some other room, you also sit in the same room and be talking then and there. You should not talk continuously and irritate him.
If he is getting irritated even with your little talks, you can watch his face immediately and question him.
If he is really chatting, he will always want to drive you away from that place.
If he is doing his office work, he will not do that.
By this activity, you can get confirmed about his activities.
If the situation is proved that he is going in the wrong path, then you tell him, that you want to solve this problem or rather your doubts.
This talk should happen during the evening time with tea and snacks, in a relaxed mood.
Talk to him frankly.
Tell him that he was sharing everything till 4 months back and you feel that , he is hiding something , nowadays.
Tell him that you love him so much and he is everything in your life.
Tell him that you are very much disturbed , whether he is avoiding you.
Plead him not to hide anything from you and you want to be his best wife and will do anything of his choice.
Tell him to reciprocate the same for you, so that the harmony of the family life will be fine.
Ask him to be like the same person, as he was till he was 4 months back.
Tell him there should be no doubts or hiccups in your married life for ever, and to maintain this, nothing should be hidden between you both.
Another suggestion is,if you do not have any child till now, please go for a child as soon as possible. Now, his attention will surely be only on you and your future child. In case you are planning your child for later years, please drop that idea and go for the child immediately.
All the best for your life without any hiccups.
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