Chemistry of Love
Discussions on "Chemistry of Love" in "My Better half" forum.
16th Sep 2011, 10:32 PM #1
Chemistry of Love
Chemistry of Love
Do I love you because you're beautiful,
Or are you beautiful because I love you?
It can be best described as a very strong feeling that is deep down in the pit of your stomach. You experience this feeling when you are around that special somebody or when you happen to be thinking about them. These strong feelings can be of affection, attraction and enjoyment. In a way, it is kind of like all three of these feelings rolled up into one emotion. Many people feel wonderful when they experience this. Once you understand the Meaning of Love then you can truly harness its power.
Different Kinds of Love:
- loving feelings towards a love object that are largely based upon fantasy and idealization (instead of experience). Often when partners get to know each other, infatuation diminishes.
An abiding love for a partner with whom you feel passion, attraction, caring and respect.
a passionate love usually involving sexual feelings for a love interest.
Companionate Love- feelings of warmth towards a friend with whom you love to spend time
A type of affection and caring that is so strong that you feel it consistently, regardless of what that other person does
A love that requires specific action or conditions in order to be maintained. For example, at its extreme, a parent who gives very conditional love would only love his child when he gets straight A’s, becomes a surgeon and has two children. The love is based on outside conditions and when they do not occur, the love is withdrawn.
A childish, innocent temporary crush on someone that you don’t know well.
This term usually connotes love that is nurturing, accepting and protective. In actuality this love can also be given by a father etc.
- This term connotes love that involves guidance and some authority. Paternal love usually prepares a child to be ready for the outside world. Again, in reality this type of love is not gender specific.
This type of love is described as a love that has survived multiple life times. Not everyone believes in this concept.
This type of love recognizes the Divine light in everyone and everything. Love is given to everyone as an act of loving God.
Love of your country or patriotism
- This is love for the place you live or the place that were born. It is a type of loyalty and a special feeling of belonging that you attribute to that specific geographic location.
This is a positive feeling that you have about who you are and what you deserve. It often is expressed by treating yourself well, respecting yourself, wanting yourself to be happy and expecting others to respect you too.
This term connotes having a feeling of love for your neighbor, because all humanity is considered to be part of a larger family of human beings.
This term is used to describe a love that is expressed by setting boundaries for the good of the other person. So for example, a parent may send their teenager to rehab if he is drug addicted, even if he does not want to go. They feel that this is an act of love because it stems from a desire for their son’s ultimate good and happiness.
The causes of love
A lot of people believe that love is causeless. That it is unexplainable, that it has no rhyme or reason, that a person simply loves another and that’s it
Many go even further and say that, even if it was possible to say that, it would be undesirable, because it would ruin the “purity” of love, that love should be causeles
I believe feelings do have causes. You may not think about it consciously, you may not even be aware of those causes, but you fall in love with something (or things) in the other person. Their sense of humor, their intelligence, the way they make you feel alive, the special smile they have just for you, their passion for life, etc.. “Love without cause” is for teenagers , or for when both people are so “low” that they can’t find anything to love in the other… and yet they are OK with it, because they know there’s nothing to love in themselves
Love and bio-chemicals
When falling in love the skin flushes, breathing is heavier, and palms become sweaty because the brain is experiencing a biochemical rush of dopamine, norepinephrine and phenylethylamine which are chemically similar to amphetamines.
For this reason some neuroscientists believe that people who jump from one relationship to another have become addicted to the chemicals produced when falling in love
Where long-term romantic love is concerned the mere presence of one's love partner stimulates the production of endorphins in the brain.
Romantic attraction is actually a primitive, biologically-based drive similar to hunger or thirst
The urge for romance is what causes a person to focus on one particular individual. Therefore this biological need for romance explains why someone would willingly walk several miles for a simple hug from their loved one, or experience enormous despair in the face of later rejection
Romantic attraction activates portions of the brain with high concentrations of receptors for dopamine which is the chemical messenger associated with feelings of euphoria, cravings and even addictions
Therefore when people are falling in love they often exhibit signs of elevated dopamine levels including increased energy, less need for sleep and food, as well as highly focused attention.
Love is blind
We’ve all heard the expression that "love is blind" and the chemical factor supports this as it creates an altered state of consciousness and therefore perception
We idealize those we love and overlook the flaws they may possess which paves the way to a long-term relationship because its as respectful as it is forgiving
Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes an habit
16th Sep 2011, 10:33 PM #2
Re: Chemistry of Love
Reasons for Love failure
1.LACK OF SELF-DISCIPLINE
Discipline comes through self-control you must first control yourself. Self-mastery is the hardest job you will ever tackle. If you do not conquer self, you will be conquered by self.
No person may enjoy outstanding success without good health. The causes of ill health is due to
a. Overeating of foods not conducive to health
b. Wrong habits of thought; giving expression to negatives.
c. Wrong use of, and over indulgence in sex.
3. childhood atmosphere
Most people who have criminal tendencies acquire them as the result of bad environment, and improper associates during childhood.
This is one of the most common causes of failure.Most of us go through life as failures, because we are waiting for the “time to be right” to start doing something worthwhile.
5. LACK OF PERSISTENCE
Most of us are good “starters” but poor “finishers” of everything we begin. Moreover, people are prone to give up at the first signs of defeat
6. LACK OF CONTROLLED SEXUAL URGE.
powerful of all the stimuli which move people into ACTION. Because it is the most powerful of the emotions, it must be controlled,
7. DESIRE FOR “SOMETHING FOR NOTHING
The gambling instinct drives millions of people to failure.
There is no hope of success for the person who repels people through a negative personality
9.POWER OF DECISION
People who fail, reach decisions, if at all, very slowly, and change them frequently, and quickly.
10. BASIC FEARS
Poverty, Criticism, Ill health, Jealousy, Old age, Death.
11. WRONG SELECTION OF A MATE
This a most common cause of failure
12. SUPERSTITION AND PREJUDICE.
Superstition is a form of fear. It is also a sign of ignorance
13.THE HABIT OF INDISCRIMINATE SPENDING.
The spend-thrift cannot succeed, mainly because he stands eternally in FEAR OF POVERTY
14. LACK OF ENTHUSIASM.
Without enthusiasm one cannot be convincing.
The person with a “closed” mind on any subject seldom gets ahead.even in relationship
16.POSSESSION OF POWER
Money,Position in the society or misuse ones weakness are also poison to Love
One may be temporarily dishonest by force of circumstances over which one has no control, without permanent damage. But, there is NO HOPE for the person who is dishonest by choice
18. EGOTISM AND VANITY
. These qualities serve as red lights which warn others to keep away. THEY ARE FATAL TO SUCCESS.
19. GUESSING INSTEAD OF THINKING.
Most people are too indifferent or lazy to acquire FACTS with which to THINK ACCURATELY. guesswork or snap-judgments.also reasons for failure
Over-caution is as bad as under-caution. Both are extremes to be guarded against. Life itself is filled with the element of chance.
It takes more than a college degree to make one a person of education. Any person who is educated is one who has learned to get whatever he wants in life without violating the rights of others
It seems to many that love is a mystery. When one relationship ends, they fear they may not find someone new, or be able to love again. Or, even when they are trying as hard as they can, often unexpected obstacles arise in the relationship that cannot be overcome.
You would never try to build a building without first getting an architect's plan. Without a strong foundation, any passing storm would easily knock the building down. The same is true of relationships.
No one is a failure in love. Our mistakes, losses, confusion and mishaps do not arise because of love. They arise simply out of our ignorance of who we are and what love truly is. Once we learn what love is and how to practice it, we simply cannot fall down again.
Love brings fulfillment, healing, kindness, warmth and inspiration. Let us separate truth from error.Let us learn how to build relationships that are based on a strong foundation
Veenaiyadi Nee Enakku - YouTube
23rd Sep 2011, 11:20 PM #3
Re: Chemistry of Love