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  • 4 Post By saraswathi2014
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My better Half!!!


Discussions on "My better Half!!!" in "My Better half" forum.


  1. #1
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    My better Half!!!

    Hi friends,

    Me and my dear husband got married in december 2012, and we are leading happy family. I lost my mom and brother in next next years before my marriage itself. My dad only taking care of me like a mom..I have only one sister now..My husband's family is distance relations to us.So they decided me as their DIL...Mine is very lower middle class..i was working before my marriage..My husband family is well in status and everything..My MIL is very good in character ..Now coming to my problem right now..
    Once we got engaged we used to talk in phone a lot..that time itself i spoke to my husband that Im the only support for my dad..I cant leave as such..
    He was in US at that time,,Now we both are staying US only.He helped me financially before my marriage itself( This is not known to my MIL).. he helped for my sister's education also..He said that i will take care of your dad nu..So i accepted for this marriage..Im in dependant visa so i cant work here in US..
    Now after marriage if i ask money for my dad, my husband is getting angry..(NAN ORUTHANEY ETHANA PERA PAAKRATHU NU SOLDRARU)..
    but enga appa kasta padum podhu ennala kasta padama iruka mudila yenna avaruku nan than periya ponnu nan than avaruku paiyan maari irukanum nu nenaikren..Now also he is helping some times but every time i have to beg him or if i cry then he will give.. but this hurts me a lot..Im very very depressed..If i earn money, i can give to my dad,,but that is not possible now..Because we dont have baby,,we are trying for nearly two yrs..I cant leave my husband and come to chennai for working,,At the same time, i cant leave my dad to suffer financially,..Please give me some suggestions friends..

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    Parasakthi, jv_66, sumitra and 1 others like this.

  2. #2
    sumitra's Avatar
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    Re: My better Half!!!

    Hi Saraswathi, I appreciate your problem. But it is not always the responsibility of the daughter to look after her father. You have looked after your father to the maximum extent even after your marriage. Even your husband was cooperative to your willingness to look after your father. So don't get a guilty conscious that you have left your father without any help. If possible take your father along with you abroad keep him with your family in US if your husband's VISA status permits. This way your husband also will not feel too much that he is taking care of so many persons. Leaving your father in India and asking money from your husband for the welfare of your father is not always correct. Hence don't worry and discuss with your husband regarding this. All the best! thank you!


  3. #3
    MURUGANANDHAM's Avatar
    MURUGANANDHAM is offline Commander's of Penmai
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    Re: My better Half!!!

    Hi Saraswathi, I Understand your prbm. Nammaipol ulla ladiskku ithupol varum prblms niraiya. naama face pannithan aaganum. Then Now a days online jobs niraiya ullathu. Neengal online-la iruppathal veetil irunthabadiye online jobs ethavathu try seithu paarkalam. Ithu enakku therintha oru vazhithan. Veru ethavathum irukkalam. Ithai neengal try seithu paarkalamey..........

    jv_66, sumitra and saraswathi2014 like this.

  4. #4
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    Re: My better Half!!!

    Thanks sumitra and anuratha for your supporting words..Will take necessary steps..

    jv_66 and sumitra like this.

  5. #5
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    Re: My better Half!!!

    Hi Saraswathi, you are most welcome!

    jv_66 likes this.

  6. #6
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    jv_66 is offline Super Moderator Silver Ruler's of Penmai
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    Re: My better Half!!!

    Hi Saraswathi,

    Please don't mind for these words of mine. It may sound little harsh, but it is the fact.

    It is not a must for the married daughter to support her father.

    You have got a very good and understanding husband, who has helped monetarily for your family, even before your marriage.

    You should be grateful to him since he has helped your family till now including for the studies of your sister.

    Earlier he would'nt have known the nature and amount of burden which he would face, that is why, he had accepted. Later, now he might find it very difficult to help both your and his family.

    And one more thing, your father must be fit enough to earn now, on his own. though his earning may be little. Only with this earning, your parents have brought up you 3 children.

    Even now, I am seeing so many elders who are still earning even at the age of 80. They are earning with the job which suits their age and health. Even if the only daughter offers to help them, they do not want to loose their self respect and that is why they are earning. They say that, till their health permits, they would like to work and never want to be a burden for their daughter.

    So, now, your father will not be more than 60 and hope he will be fit to earn his living.

    The main thing which I wanted to convey is, if your husband is willing to help your father monetarily for every month, you may very happily help.

    You may not beg him or cry for the help.

    Later, he may become fed up and he might not be in a mood to help for the monetary help during your sister's marriage, which your father may need necessarily.

    So, please keep this in mind.

    If you are able to find any job, you may help your father with that money, to some extent.


    sumitra likes this.
    Jayanthy





  7. #7
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    Re: My better Half!!!

    Thanks jayanthy!!! im not taking it as harsh words from you..I understand everything and will try to balance the family..!!

    jv_66 and sumitra like this.

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