divorced before 3 years now one of my colleague proposed his love......

Joined
Jul 21, 2014
Messages
1
Likes
4
Location
mumbai
#1
i am living separately from my husband before 3 years due to misunderstanding. i have a son who is now 6 years. before a year one of my colleague proposed his love to me and telling that he is willing to marry. i explained my situation and i said no to him. but still he wants me to marry me.


i was worried a lot i don''t wnat to face another failure in my life by marrying him. what can i do now? i lost my dad during my school days and my mom too expired before 2 years. i have one brother only. he is living in dubai.
 

jv_66

Super Moderator
Staff member
Super Moderator
Joined
Dec 2, 2011
Messages
32,163
Likes
83,727
Location
Bangalore
#2
Welcome to Penmai, friend.

There is nothing wrong in Re-marriage.

Surely you need a life partner who could share everything and a good father for your son.

You can very well go ahead with the re-marriage.

But before that, you need to get clarified with few things from the person who is willing to marry you.

Is that colleague willing to marry you even now, while you have denied his proposal a year back?

If yes, then you may need to consider the following:

Is he unmarried still : Then you should talk to him before marriage, that he should never remind you about the thoughts with your ex-husband's intimacy or any other activity.

Talk to him, if he would think you as a new wife and not as a second hand.

Talk to him, whether he has no objection about your son and how would he treat him if you have another child from this person. Make sure, whether he will treat your son as the 1st child (of you both) and the second one as the sibling of the 1st one?

You can very well convince your son that this person is your new and very good father, and this person should also treat your son as his own child and pour his affection on your child. Make sure about this.

Talk to him about the previous hiccups which broke your marriage, and tell him that you never want them to be repeated in the second marriage.

If you are interested in him, by now you would have analyzed his characters and if you feel them satisfied, then you can go ahead with the marriage.

If necessary, take 2 more months, and be friendly with him and know each and everything about him and then you can accept his proposal.

Or if he is not willing for these conditions - rather suggestions, then you can marry someone else, who is a widower or any other divorcee, after analyzing totally about the character of that person.

Even if that person is having any children, you can accept for the second marriage.

In this case, you can later decide, after your marriage, whether you need to have any more children of yours.

But to whomever you get married, it is better and safe, to talk elaborately about all the matters, well before marrige, which I have mentioned above.

Nowadays, you have many re-marriage matrimonies from which you can register and find a suitable partner.

I have seen many couples who have re married and are now very compatible. So, please don't loose hope.

And I would suggest you to get married as soon as possible, since now at this young age, your son might accept a new father, whereas, if he grows bigger, he might rebel sometimes.

And also, your son will be very happy to have both father and mother as his other friends have, since now, he might have been mentally upset (he will not know to tell it outside) about not having a father figure similar to his friends.

So, please don't hesitate more and get married soon to a suitable person and enjoy the married life.

Please be Optimistic about married life and make up your mind to face any challenges.

Almost all the married couples will surely have some or other hiccups in their married life and you must surely overcome these, provided there is no extra marital affairs. All the other problems can easily be solved and even this could be accepted if he is coming out of the affair and is totally dedicated to the wife thereafter.

If necessary, please go through the following links, which may be of help to your future life.

How to run Smooth family



http://www.penmai.com/forums/marrie...good-relation-understanding-your-husband.html
 
Last edited:
Joined
Dec 30, 2011
Messages
7
Likes
8
Location
Chennai
#3
Hi ,

I agree with Jv.There is nothing wrong in remarriage.
But before that have a open talk with him about the pros and cons.
Also your kid's future should not be affected at any cost.
So think in all dimensions and decide.

~Prasath
 

Similar threads

Important Announcements!

Type in Tamil

Click here to go to Google transliteration page. Type there in Tamil and copy and paste it.