how to change my husband’s negative attitude.

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#1
Hi all, i am kaveri, I was married before 3 years, my husband is always approaching almost all the thing negatively. whenever i gave any ideas for improvement of our life he is giving negative comments only. I had advised hime a lot but his attitude never changing.


tell me some idea to change his negative approach towards the life.
 

suganthiramesh

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#2
I know everything... you need not teach me anything.......intha manobaavam thaan kaaranam.

intha ulagathula husband ku pidikkaatha ore vishayam wife solra advise.... evvalavu naama advise panromo avvalavo against thaan pannuvaanga.... yennaa husband ku ellaam theriyum wife naa konjam arivu kamminnu inga rathathila[blood] oori poyirukku....

Iva enna solrathu naama enna kekkarathu nu solrathukku opposite aa kooda seivaanga... onno solrappave opposite aa sollunga... illanaa advise panratha vittudunga... 95% ippadi thaan irukkaanga... yaaraavathu oru silar thaan exceptional... athe advise a avanga parents or kooda poranthavanga sonnaa achu pisagaama yethuppaanga... correctaa....
 
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umaravi2011

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#3
Hi Kaveri

Do not worry.


There is hope for you and always remember it's NEVER too late for anything!

Don't just sit there and wallow blaming him for everything.

change your attitude and your way of looking at things.


Ask him how would he like things to be, what are his thoughts about the current situation and what ideas and suggestions does he have for creating a different type of relationship.


You are throwing the ball in his court (and a tennis racket too!) and you are saying to him that this game cannot be played with just one player, IT NEEDS TWO PLAYERS!

He needs to play an active part in the relationship too.

Then brainstorm together all the ideas he has come up with and decide on those that will help your relationship the most.

All the very best
 
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#4
Friends, Thanks for your reply. Uma you have given a very good idea. I will discuss with him and i will try to know his thoughts and ideas of our life.

thanks a lot.
 

srathi

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#5
HI KAVERI,

FEW WEEKS BACK ONLY I READ ABOUT HOW TO DEAL WITH THE NEGATIVE THINKING PEOPLE..

1. FIRST U UNDERSTAND WHY UR HUSBAND IS SO NEGATIVE?
e.g frustration,, hate his job,,hurted by others----
first u want to find out where it's coming from then it is easy to deal with him

2. WHENEVER UR HUSBAND TALKS ABOUT NEGATIVE THINGS DON'T SAY ANYTHING. JUST SMILE AND REMAIN COMPLETELY DETACHED FROM IT AND DON'T GET INVOLVED IN IT. LEAVE THE PLACE IMMEDIATELY

3. THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS TO LET GO WITH LOVE AND HAVE FAITH THAT EVERYTHING WILL TURN OUT FOR THE BEST

4. U CAN PASS THE POSITIVE VIBRATION TO UR HUSBAND

IF U HAVE FREE TIME U CAN VISIT THIS WEBSITE FOR THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING.
http://www.successconsciousness.com/index_000009.htm

ALL THE BEST
DON'T WORRY EVERYTHING WILL BE K. .
 
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#6
HI KAVERI,

FEW WEEKS BACK ONLY I READ ABOUT HOW TO DEAL WITH THE NEGATIVE THINKING PEOPLE..

1. FIRST U UNDERSTAND WHY UR HUSBAND IS SO NEGATIVE?
e.g frustration,, hate his job,,hurted by others----
first u want to find out where it's coming from then it is easy to deal with him

2. WHENEVER UR HUSBAND TALKS ABOUT NEGATIVE THINGS DON'T SAY ANYTHING. JUST SMILE AND REMAIN COMPLETELY DETACHED FROM IT AND DON'T GET INVOLVED IN IT. LEAVE THE PLACE IMMEDIATELY

3. THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS TO LET GO WITH LOVE AND HAVE FAITH THAT EVERYTHING WILL TURN OUT FOR THE BEST

4. U CAN PASS THE POSITIVE VIBRATION TO UR HUSBAND

IF U HAVE FREE TIME U CAN VISIT THIS WEBSITE FOR THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING.
http://www.successconsciousness.com/index_000009.htm

ALL THE BEST
DON'T WORRY EVERYTHING WILL BE K. .
thank you so much friend
 

umaravi2011

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#7
Friends, Thanks for your reply. Uma you have given a very good idea. I will discuss with him and i will try to know his thoughts and ideas of our life.

thanks a lot.
Welcome dear dont worry you will live a very happy life with your husband

all the best for a peaceful long married life
 
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#8
Hi Kaveri!!!

Don't loose hope. Just keep trying. Hope you will win the battle where you can find your husband being changed. Try out, sit and settle out. Even if you want, you can try out a good astrologer with your husband's birth chart.
 

nlakshmi

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#9
No worries kaveri...
You are not alone.. almost 99% of couples go through this... Dont loose hope.. Never loose your positive approach to things... Do what you do it without stopping.. If you want to chip in your ideas in certain things..like certain family matters.. Just let your husband hear it out...(okkanthu pesina velaikku aagathu... porapokkula kaathula potuttute irunga).. you know what i mean.. So he can understand, apart from thinking negative.. there is another dimension for the whole situation... Though it takes time for him to accept your approach...he might consider your view of solution for the problem... The negativity has set on him for 25+ years and it takes a little time to accept and change...So dont stop your positive approach to the problems... Be confident and vibrant on everything.. Its not easy for you too.. to be vibrant when there is not so encouragement going around you.. but for that matter, you cannot loose your self identity.. i.e., a positive person....
Dont keep on telling him that he is thinking negatively... Go along with him, hear him what he is saying.. and then drop in your approach to the problems...
Talk to his mom about his childhood mindset, any family issues bothering him(on both sides), is he less confident on something, Are you brainy than him? which is bothering his confidence level? Work pressure? ego clash in the office, or just male ego...
Get some positive thinking books ,problem solver, the way to approach things positively books and put those in his eye sight level... but dont insist or pesture him to read.. when he sees it daily, though he may not touch it in the beginning.. he will start turning pages in a short while...

hope it helps...:)
 
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#10
தோழி,
nlakshmi சொன்னது போல், நீங்கள் தனியாக இல்லை. இது போன்ற எண்ணற்ற ஜோடிகள் உள்ளன. male ego அவ்வளவு எளிதாக மாறக்கூடியது அல்ல. எனவே, நீங்கள் அவருக்கு புத்தி சொல்வதை நிறுத்திவிட்டு, positive thinking ன் நன்மைகளை அவராகவே புரிந்து கொள்ள அவரறியாமல் வாய்ப்புக்களை ஏற்படுத்தலாமே!

நல்ல புத்தகங்களை அவர் கண்ணில் படும்படி வைப்பது, positive thinking உள்ள மனிதர்களை அவருக்கு அறிமுகப் படுத்தி விடுவது, advice போல அல்லாமல் casual ஆக கருத்துக்களை சொல்வது, அவர் எதிர்த்தால் அதனால் பாதிக்கப் படாமல் ஒரு புன்னகையோடு பேச்சை திசை திருப்புவது, போன்ற சில வழிமுறைகள் உபயோகமாக இருக்கும்.

எல்லாவற்றையும் விட, அவர் மாறிக்கொண்டிருக்கிறார் என்று உறுதியாக நீங்கள் நம்ப வேண்டும். அந்த நம்பிக்கை அவரை மாற்றும்.

வாழ்த்துக்கள்!
 

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