Look Whos Stalking Now
Husbands Hire Private Eyes To Spy On Working Wives
Kamini Mathai | TNN
With more women entering the workforce,it appears that an increasing
number of men are entering the offices of private detectives.
A few years ago,it wasnt unusual for wives to have their husbands
shadowed because they suspected them of having extramarital affairs.
But now the tables have turned,say private detectives in the city.
In the last couple of years we have seen more cases of husbands su
specting their wives of infidelity,
says private investigator AM Malathy,
adding that the men are usually in their 20s or 30s.
Bennett Sugirtharaj,who heads Probe Detective Agencies in Chennai,
says that he gets 50 cases a month from men across the country
wanting their wives shadowed.
The number of women hiring us for the same has reduced to 30, he says.
What Sugirtharaj finds more surprising is that,in the last couple of years,
the number of men hiring detectives to shadow their wives has surpassed
even the number of corporate cases (employee verification etc) they
get in a month.
We find that a majority of the time,it is insecurity that brings husbands
to our offices.
It stems from the fact that their wives are becoming more financially
independent, working late and,in some cases,even earning more than
them, says Malathy.
C o u n s e l l o r Saras Bhaskar says that these days more men are trying
to make their marriages work and initiating counseling.
In the past,it was the w o m e n who would bring their husbands in.
At least now,I am seeing both sides make an effort, she says.
In her practice,Bhaskar has found that with couples who are married
less than 15 years,it is the wives who fix the appointment,
complaining that their husbands are so busy working that they do not
spend time with them.
The tables are turned when it comes to couples who are married for over
20 years,with more husbands initiating counselling.
The children have moved out and suddenly the woman has a lot of time
n her hands
and so she has found ways to keep herself busy.
The husband,on the other hand,has retired and finds that when
he has all the time in the world,she has no time for him.And now,he is
worried, she says.
Psychiatrist Dr Vijay Nagaswami believes that though the walls of
patriarchy are weakening, men are still in the transition period.
Most men are still not comfortable with their wives working.
And until they find an alternative way of dealing with the fact that
their spouses are becoming more independent,
we are going to see this kind of suspicion, says Dr Nagaswami.
The good news is that,compared to five years ago,more men are
initiating the counselling process and seem to want to make their
marriages work,he says.
The irony,say private investigators,is that in 90% of the cases,the
women are just working hard because they want to contribute more
financially to the house.
Only 10% are cheating on their husbands, says Sugirtharaj.
The rest of the cases could have been solved if the couple had
just sat down and talked it out.
Courtesy: Times of India