Love actually? Knot really!


Lord of Penmai
Jul 5, 2011
Love actually? Knot really!

For a generation that flaunts its relationship status but hides it from the parents, marriage isn't redundant, it just figures late in the scheme of things.

For a city known to be culturally orthodox, the changing equations between young girls and boys could be an eye-opener for some. According to the survey, 59% of youngsters today are in a relationship.

Relationship status

Boys: Always committed
Girls: May be

In fact, it's quite a fad these days to flaunt your relationship status. "Yes. it is! Believe you me, having a girlfriend or boyfriend is a must for social acceptance. Girlfriend honi hi honi hai life mein," says young businessman Shahnawaz Khan. He adds, "If you don't want to be termed gay, you need to have a partner of the opposite sex, else one becomes the subject of ridicule in one's friend circle. I don't want my friends to tease me, and so, I make sure there's a girl in my life whom I can introduce to my friends as my GF."

Apparently, the pressure to flaunt an arm candy is increasing on the boys in town, while the girls can still take it easy. Says Rashi Srivastava, a professional, "The trend to be in a relationship simply to make a public statement exists more among boys, and not so much for girls. The fairer sex can still get away with a single status, boys can't. Unke liye toh ek girlfriend hona must hai."

But Ankita Mehrotra is an example of how even girls succumb to peer pressure. "I didn't want to be the odd one out. Most of my friends go out as couples on outings and I was the only one without a BF. It used to be embarrassing at times to see everyone busy with their partners."

For those of you thinking that relationships are about love, it's time to ask - what's love got to do with it. For, as it turns out, a girlfriend or boyfriend is mostly there to fulfill a need in your life, and not necessarily an emotional one. As Radhika Sharma points out, "Having a boyfriend is the safest bet to avoid unnecessary eyeballs following you on the campus. Plus, you feel really safe on the whole in a city like Lucknow if you have a boyfriend with you." A friend in need is a boyfriend indeed!

Hush-hush darling
While having a someone special in life might be the 'in' thing to do, telling your parents about them isn't. With a whopping 80% youngsters surveyed saying that their parents have no clue about what's going on in their love life, Lucknow's conventional image as an orthodox city jumps back to the fore. Parents, are you listening?

So, what's the reason for not sharing the truth with their parents? "What should we tell them about our partners, when we ourselves are not sure about our future together?" shrugs Trishna Khurana, a collegian. Trishna has been in a relationship for almost two years now but she is not sure if her boyfriend is the one for her. "We break up once almost every month. Relationships today are not stable. When divorces are so common these days, toh break-ups toh are a very small thing," she adds.

Agreeing completely with Trishna is another college-goer, Aditya Singh. "If you tell parents today that you are seeing someone and if you're of the marriageable age, they would want you to settle down with that person immediately. Parents know how unsure we youngsters are about our love life these days, so they try to make decisions on behalf of their children. We go for too many hits and trials before we finally say 'yes' to someone for a long-term commitment. Marriage or love isn't that easy today," she explains.

Shaddi? Sshhh...
Not surprisingly then, 66% youngsters in the survey say they have no plans to marry the guy or girl they're dating. "It may sound cliched, but the truth is that marriage is a life long commitment and you can't just marry anyone on a whim! For today's generation, compatibility is what matters the most. And we take our own time to decide whether we're compatible enough with somone to spend our entire lives with them.," explains marketing executive Ruchika.

A commitment-phobic generation, is it? Not really. For, marriage is very much on the cards for these youngsters, just that they're keen on pushing the wedding date to as late as possible. Nearly 55% of respondents say they have no plans to search for a life partner before 25.

However, according to Abhishek Maurya, there's a practical reason why it makes sense to marry that late. "Aaj kal padhai hi itni saal tak karni padti hai that 25 years is too early to get married," he says, adding, "Graduation ke baad post graduation, phir specialization aur phir job and then paying off the education loan...yeh sab karte karte aaram se 28-29 years ho jatey hain for a boy or a girl. And then, there's time for marriage finally."
Last edited by a moderator:

Similar threads

Important Announcements!

Type in Tamil

Click here to go to Google transliteration page. Type there in Tamil and copy and paste it.