Post-Adoption Depression Syndrome PADS


Lord of Penmai
Jul 5, 2011
Post-Adoption Depression Syndrome PADS

New parents have heard about the 'the baby blues' or post partum depression. But other than that, there is something else which is less discussed and hits many parents who adopt a child. Most people are not aware of Post-Adoption Depression Syndrome or PADS, which affects many adoptive moms i

It is a phase of self-doubt, inadequacy and a sense of detachment from the adopted child. When a woman conceives she has nine months to prepare for the arrival of a child and motherhood. In adoption, a woman attains motherhood unexpectedly. "It often comes too quickly,". Baby shock can be really hard on a new adoptive mother. She may be unable to connect with the child or develop an attachment towards it. To make it worse, there will be feelings of guilt about this. She also begins to doubt her decision to adopt the baby. Criticism or comments from family and friends may make the feelings of inadequacy worse.

While post partum depression is caused primarily by hormonal imbalance and typically lasts for up to two weeks, PADS is definitely not hormonal and can last much longer.


Some of the environmental cause may be the same as they are in case of childbirth, such as, adjusting to the reality, change of schedule and lack of sleep. But adoptive parents sometimes feel an emotional letdown after the intensity of emotions involved in adoption. Many adoptive parents also hold themselves to higher and unrealistic standards that most biological parents do not. They believe they do not have the right to complain about any aspect of parenting.

Often PADS is also caused in women who are forced to adopt.some women simply cannot accept adopted children as their own. She has, in two cases, requested women to return their children as she thought it was the best option for both mother and the child.

it particularly in country like India social aspects complicate the issue. Some people believe they are destined to be childless and carry this bad luck forward into the life of the adopted child. Many times relatives raise caste issues and raise questions about the genealogy of the child which further makes it difficult for parents to accept the child.

It can be dealt with:

Luckily, just as post partum depression recedes and can be taken care of, so can PADS. support from the spouse and family can help the mother improve her self-esteem and give her strength to deal with the new situation. It helps to know that what she is suffering from is not unusual. Hence, taking professional help or joining a support group can help.

Keep a positive attitude:

Know that bonding and attachment are slow processes. Learn to be patient. Give yourself and your child some time to be together.

Keep pesky relatives at bay:

When attending a family function, accept only those invitations which welcome your new child. Avoid gatherings that can turn out to be uncomfortable for you and your child. And when you have developed a repot with your child and are confident about your relationship, it wouldn't make much of a difference what people have to say about your child. Enroll in a parentchild play group. Active play will help lower frustration levels for both of you and conversation with other adults will make you feel better about your decision.
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