son not respecting elders

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#1
my son is now 14 years old. he is not at all respecting elders who visit our house whether it may be our relative or neighbours or friends. when they ask his name and what are you doing he is not responding well. i scolded him many times for this behaviour he is not at all changing.

what shall i do? how can i teach him to respect elders.
 

jv_66

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#2
Welcome to Penmai....Suganthi. @suganthi siva

Please don't worry for this.

Few Children in their teenage, do behave like this.

But please clarify, whether, he is behaving like this, only in the recent years (during his teenage) or right from his childhood...say 5,6 years of age.

If he is behaving like this from the beginning, then he is of Shy type and will never like to mingle with others than the Parents.

Or if he is behaving like this only from the recent years, then it is due to his hormonal changes and due to this, there will be few changes in his characters also, including these type.

Anyway, what you could do now is please stop Scolding him for this or any other reasons.

Hereafter, scoldings may not help much. If you happen to scold him, he will surely stand stubborn.

So, one fine day, when he is in his leisure time and when nobody is at home, you can ask him, about this behaviour of his. You should ask this very softly.

Tell him that you want to know whether he has any specific reason for this behaviour.

Then you may tell him that you are able to understand him and his age .

During this teenage, they will shut their room door and will always sit there only without mingling with others, especially when any of the external persons arrive. This is quite common. And you should understand them and try to respect their feelings.

Then , you can tell him softly, that (if he had answered these type of questions from others till now), everybody feel him as the same boy and hence asking those questions and they expect the similar answers from him as earlier.

Or if this is a sudden behaviour also, (for both the circumstances), you can tell him that, whenever any body is enquiring him about his studies or his future, ask him to just answer only those with a small smile.

Tell him that they would be pleased with this, and then he can move to his room or some other work with just a smile.

With this activity of his, everyone will be happy and he would also feel happy with their compliments about him.

If he shows his anger or disrespect towards others, they will never have a good impression on him.

Tell him that if anybody visiting your house enquires about him, you or your husband will call him and he needs just to answer few words with a small smile and that will do.

And one more thing for you,

You may not call him to have a big chat with the visitors.

You should understand that, the teenage children will like to mingle only with their friends and none else. They will hate the elders.

This is a temporary phase and they will come out of this very soon.
 
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#3
Teenage Boys go through many behavioral changes at this age, the changes are sometimes hard to deal with. Positive approach is very important.
 
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girija chandru

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#4
Hi @suganthisiva
dear,

1) kindly sit with him. talk about his feelings.
2)ask him softly why he is not responding.
3) then., advise him pleasantly, how he should behave.
4) please, never compare him with others.
5) please, never scold him before others. (this wil only aggravate him)
6) everything has a reason. there must be a reason for the child (your son) too.understand and appreciate his feelings.

thaai ariyaa vidil yaar arivar?
thaai unarththaa vidil yaar unarththuvar?
:pray1:
 

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