Tips to maintain good relationship with SIL ( Sister(s)- in- law)

jv_66

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#1
Tips to have good relations with your SIL

Once after your engagement with your future husband, all your relatives, your parents and siblings will make you worry with their frightening talks about the main person MIL and the next one is the SILs.

But please do not get frightened with these kind of talks.

You can overcome all the situations once you make up your mind to tackle any situation to come.

Here are some tips to have a very good relationship with your SILs.
 

jv_66

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#2
  • Once you are engaged with your future husband , enquire all the details about his sister/s, like whether she is studying or married and all the whereabouts about her.
  • Next, if your SIL is interested in talking with you, you can proceed to build the friendship even before marriage.
  • She might visit along with her parents during the purchases of your wedding. During those time, have a pleasant smile towards her and try to talk atleast few friendly words with her.
  • This will create a very good impression about you to her and your in-laws.
  • Now, after marriage, you should remember that only your SIL will somewhat be similar with your age compared to your in-laws. So, your first friend should be your SIL.
  • Sometimes they may be very much elder to you. Nevermind. Now, you can show your respect to them along with your in-laws. At the same time, you can be little more friendly with her comparing the generation gap with the in-laws.
  • You should bear in mind that , though you build your friendship strongly with her, immediately after marriage , please do not reveal all your family matters (your parent’s house).
  • Initially, you can share about your studies, friends (here also, you should be careful , if you had or have many male friends – do not reveal much about them as this may turn adverse in future) office, your likes and dislikes.
  • In the same way, you can inquire about her studies, friends, likes and dislikes. Please do remember about her likes and dislikes.
 

jv_66

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  • At the same time, do not be too close with her and never complain about anyone in your husband’s family. Also do not make any fun of any one in their family and also yours. Later, she might also make fun of your parents or siblings, which will surely hurt your feelings.
  • After one month of your marriage, till when you would have enjoyed many outings with your husband, you can call your SIL also, when you happen to go for outings in the weekends or for any picnics.
  • You can take her during your purchases and don’t forget to get her also the similar purchases of yours.
  • Do remember her birthday and surprise her with her favorite gifts.
  • If she is younger to you, give only friendly advises to her very rarely. Otherwise, she would try to avoid talking to you.
  • If she is studying, you can try to help her in studies.
  • You can accompany her to the tution classes if any and in case of necessity.
  • You can inquire about her studies, help during her exam studies by giving her company.
  • You can help her during her marriage in the purchases and involve totally in the works related to the marriage. You can also give her confidence and moral support for the marriage.
 

jv_66

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#4
  • In case, if she is already married, you can contact her through phone atleast twice in a week.
  • Enquire about the well being of her and all the others in her family.
  • You can share some recipes and also know her recipes. This will make her happy.
  • If she is in the same place of yours, try to visit her atleast once in a month along with your husband or MIL.
  • If she is away from your place try to visit atleast once in a year. But be sure, that if she or her family doesn’t like you to stay longer in their house, plan a trip only for 2 days or so.
  • When you visit their house or during their visit to your house, do not forget to give some gifts to all the members in their family. The gifts need not be costly. But it will definitely show your affection towards them.
  • Now, if the SIL is backbiting about you to her parents and if they scold you after this, just keep quiet. Do not react immediately. A little later, if you have a different version, try to explain your point of view in a very soft manner. Sometimes they might understand you r view and act accordingly. Even if they do not understand, do not mind for it, but you can understand the character of your SIL and her parents. This will help you to be careful with them in future. So, always try to talk carefully.
  • In case, if she is complaining about you to your husband and if your husband inturn have war of words with you in front of them, just keep quiet. Do not react. Later, you can explain everything to him when you both are alone in your room or anywhere else. But remember, these explanations should be over before you go to bed. No quarrel or misunderstandings should reflect in the bed.
  • Tell your husband that, if someone from his family is complaining about you, he may not bounce on you immediately without knowing your stand. Ask him to be calm at that time and he can tell his sister or parents that he will decide about it in a calm mood. Thus the temperament would certainly change when the decision is not taken in an angry mood.
  • And please don’t be complaining always about your SIL to your husband. He would get irritated. Then and there you can tell about her good deeds which will please him and you can tell that it would be good if she tends to change certain characters.
  • By doing like this, he might have interest in advising his sister. But tell him that while giving any advice to his sister, not to mention your name, anywhere.
  • You can involve her along with you in celebrating her parents’ birthdays and wedding days. This will create a very good impression on you,from all your in-laws.
  • Irrespective of her age, always be telling her, that you want to be a good friend with her more than as her SIL. This will surely please her.
 

jv_66

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#5
  • Now, if her children bites or beats your children, please do not beat them. But explain them that it will pain a lot for any one and they will also feel the same if it is reciprocated to them.
  • Tell your children also that these are common during childhood and within few hours they will be able to forget their fights and become friends as before. You can tell the same to her children too. Don’t make this a big issue.
  • If suppose, your SIL have lots of complaints about this, tell her also the same. Assure her that you do not mind these and does not want to make a big issue .
  • If she is complaining about her inlaws or husband, just be a listener and don’t try to advice over these. The elders in the family may decide and if you feel that they are taking any wrong decisions regarding this, you can tell your husband about your view in that matter and suggestions if any. If they are told to her and his parents by your husband , it will have a great impact. At the same time, never scold about her husband or inlaws to her. This might bounce on you later.
  • And if you have more than one SIL, please do not back bite about one to another or about their family.
  • Try to have cordial relationship with all the SILs.
  • Be the first person to help them and their family in the crisis.
  • Give respect to her feelings also and listen to her point of view in case of any misunderstanding between you both. After this, you can explain your point of view to her.
So, it is in your hand to tackle any kind of situation that might arise in your married life regarding your SILs. They will surely understand you and act accordingly even if they don’t in the beginning but in future.
 

honey rose

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#6
Wow nice ka,:thumbsup naa intha points ellam kandipa nyabagathula vachupen becoz futurela enaku use agumla.he he...
 

jv_66

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#7
Wow nice ka,:thumbsup naa intha points ellam kandipa nyabagathula vachupen becoz futurela enaku use agumla.he he...
Thanks da Divya.

Kandippa nyabagam vachukonga....illana, marriage fix aana udane, indha thread ai orudharam vandhu paarthu adhu padi nadandhukkalaam. idhe pola MIL kum solli iruken. adhaiyum paarthu payanperalaam.:)
 

honey rose

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#8
Thanks da Divya.

Kandippa nyabagam vachukonga....illana, marriage fix aana udane, indha thread ai orudharam vandhu paarthu adhu padi nadandhukkalaam. idhe pola MIL kum solli iruken. adhaiyum paarthu payanperalaam.:)
Ya sure sis...
 

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