To boost esteem, get into your friend’s head.

vijigermany

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To boost esteem, get into your friend’s head.

If you’re engaged in an endless round of self-criticism over some perceived failure, back down. Simply being nice to yourself will not only help you achieve your personal goals but also help you be happier and less stressed out, say investigators who are spearheading new research on compassion. To ramp up your self-compassion, try writing a letter to yourself about something you’ve been struggling with in the voice of a trusted pal, suggests Kristin Neff, a life-development specialist at the University of Texas.

“Imagine you are an empathetic friend and think, What would this person write to me about this situation? What would she say about what I’m going through?” Neff says. “We’ve found that most people have a much easier time being self-compassionate if they pretend to be someone else.”

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