Ways to Get Your Husband to Grow Up


Lord of Penmai
Jul 5, 2011
Ways to Get Your Husband to Grow Up

After lengthy discussions with many women (both personally and professionally), I have discovered an epidemic that is sweeping households across the nation. I call this epidemic the Husbkid Syndrome.

The Husbkid Syndrome is when your dear husband has comfortably settled into an unaware childlike state where the cause of this epidemic is 3 simple words: ENABLING – YOUR – HUSBAND.

Ladies…I ask you: Is this you?

Are you enabling your husband to the point where he is absolved of all adult responsibilities in your home? If so, then take a look at 3 possible behaviors which you may be enabling in your marriage on an ongoing basis:

1) Disrespectful behavior

Does your husband makes jokes about you in front of other people?

Does he throw a tantrum when you simply express your frustrations to him?
Are his eyes completely glued to his iPhone whenever you try to have a serious conversation with him?

If any of the above ring true to you, then the solution is simple: stop enabling it.

Just like a child, he is pushing the boundaries, so if your desire is to get your husband to act more mature, then you best draw the line. That said, some responses to the above questions could be:

If you want to be funny in front of our friends then that’s fine, but do not make me the bud of your joke. I don’t accept that.

When you’re ready to have an adult conversation without yelling at me, I’ll be in the other room… (and then you go to the other room!)

When you’re done looking at your phone, I’ll continue the conversation… (and then you let go of the conversation until he chooses to step back into adult land with you)

2) Disengaged from household needs -

Whether it’s taking out the trash, helping to clean the dishes after dinner, giving the kids a bath, taking the kids to school and/or making that (in my opinion) god awful trip to Costco, you must expect that your husband participate (whether its 50/50, 70/30, etc.) in managing the home life with you.

If you want to get your husband from being the child, then what you say to him should be simple and short. For example:

I need your help cleaning up the left over food and putting the dishes in the dishwasher. Thanks! (and you leave the room)

3) He’s your child’s BFF
Your child needs his father to be a parent, not a friend. Period. Him being the BFF not only creates less than favorable boundaries for your child, but it also gives your husband permission to be yet another whining child for you to live with. Yeaaaah….not so sexy.

That being said, if you truly want your husband to grow up so that you feel like you have an adult partner, then for God’s sake, pu-leeeeez stop enabling him.

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